Glass of Win

“Please watch out for each other and love and forgive everybody. It’s a good life, enjoy it.”

Jim Henson wrote these words to his children shortly before he passed away in 1990. Today would have been his seventy-third birthday and I wanted to make an attempt (second attempt, really, since I made my first attempt on my show) at describing why I consider Jim Henson such an integral part of my life and way of thinking.

Jim Henson seemed to be the sort of man who, by all accounts, never became short or angry or incredibly defensive with people. He was quiet, pensive, and able to communicate criticisms or adverse opinions in such a way that ensured the opposing person would not have their feelings hurt. I believed he realized that life was too short for grudges, hate, and anger to lead you through life and take over the thought process. There was too much to get done by way of laughter, learning and enjoying life.
Around the time I was recognizing severely negative traits within me that I wanted to turn around, I picked up Jim Henson: The Works – The Art, the Magic, the Imagination and found myself in tears at several points throughout the biography. Jim embodied what I desire most in myself, the passion to create and be the best human being I possibly know how, with kindness, empathy and forgiveness readily available for everyone that crosses my path.
It was these qualities that Jim infused within the Muppets, especially Kermit, the Muppet I identify most with. Kermit could do what Jim could not or refused to: let his frustration show, sometimes boiling over until he shouted as his good intentions were foiled one way or the other. However, like Jim, Kermit could pick up the pieces, love and forgive everybody, and start anew.
I struggle, of course, because I am human, and it is not so easy bein’ green for me, either, and when I am having a dark moment or a stressful hurdle throws itself abruptly in my path I am typically quick to react. However, when I look at the quote above – as I have it written strategically across my bookcase that holds my Henson related books – I am able to take a deep breath, let my mind clear and open my heart a little wider as I realize it’ll do fine, it’s a good life, and I will enjoy it.
Thank you, Jim.

Question: What does Jim Henson and his creations mean to you?

Saturday, September 19th, I was back at Nucleus Gallery for the opening reception of Terrible Yellow Eyes, an art exhibit with pieces inspired by the book Where the Wild Things Are. There were so many wonderful pieces I hardly knew how to pick and choose from! Unfortunately, due to a mishap at my directory, I have lost all of the pictures that I took.

If you want to check out the entire collection go to Gallery Nucleus: Terrible Yellow Eyes.

Question: Are you looking forward to the upcoming film of Where the Wild Things Are?

Being suave with words is always a skill that will come in handy in life, and witty comebacks can be used as a tool for impressive LULZ, but also has the potential to be your verbal rapier when pinned down and cornered.

Through my own personal journey through meeting others, particularly through the internet, I have had many lessons where I learned that no matter how skilled I am with the verbal rapier, no good can come of its unsheathing. It truly is those who walk tall and silently away from a situation that have the upper hand, that command respect from observers and will not look the fool in the end.

I was one of those people who was cheeky online – even a bit more than in “real life” – and throwing down with others over conflicting opinions or what have you was easier for me than walking away and letting person A be comfortable with whatever ill thoughts or opposing views they possessed. It IS easier to dive head first into an argument for a lot of people, such as myself whose defensiveness is always close to the surface and ready to fire up.

However, no matter what the conflict was about, I would always be cranky, even sick to my stomach and compulsively checking my inbox or whatever online outlet the argument in question was taking place on, absolutely paranoid what the other party was going to say. It made me ill to be this worried, to be so angry and spiteful. I hated it and took it out on others outside of computer world.

Finally, I recognized the problem within myself and took a giant step backwards, away from the public eye of communities, forums, and fandom and kept close with the friends I had already made and worked on myself from the inside out. I made a mental list of what I believed in, how I believed people function and how we should interact with one another and then I set out to follow it, because if I do not lead by example I cannot be here giving advice.

When I was ready to return to the “public” of the internet and being part of interactive communities, and knew I was going to share my opinions with people who may or may not agree with me, I had already resolved myself to just let things be. Should someone attempt a throwdown I would walk away. I knew it was going to take a lot of discipline on my end because this is not the person I was, ever, in my entire life. It wasn’t easy, but it got easier each time I had to virtually shake my head and agree to disagree.

Some people out in this world cannot leave well enough alone, they cannot live with the fact that there are people out there who disagree with them on any level, from the superficial to the stuff life is made from. I strongly encourage people to pick their battles wisely and never cave in to petty, catty behavior because it makes everyone look like a jackass. Oh, person A may have a gaggle of friends who will back them up no matter how inane the argument is and no matter how belligerent their friend is to others, but it is your cool head that will always save you from being caught up in the whirlwind of hate and bickering.

Of course you want to state your opinions and defend yourself, it is a natural, human trait to do so. It is simply how you do this and how you absorb the other person’s reaction that is at the heart of this, what separates those who can or cannot be talked with on any rational level.
In speech class – a wonderful course to learn the various types of speaking with people – I learned how to combat defensive talking. One of the most valuable lessons I learned was to make sure all of my arguments had more “I/me” than the accusatory “You…”

“I would have to disagree with you…I feel that such-and-such is an adequate representation of the way point A yadda yadda.”
and if your opponent is adamant about being totally juvenile about
making this a matter of I’M RIGHT, YOU’RE WRONG it is time to state:
“Well, I am sorry we cannot see eye-to-eye on this matter, I guess we will just have to agree to disagree. Bye!”

The ability to turn away and say “This is so not worth my time and energy” is by far more sharper and useful a weapon than any wit and verbal rapier can ever be. People will notice and will commend you for this quality and know you are a level-headed person to be trusted as a friend and confidant.

QUESTION: Are you able to walk away?

image by littlegirlblue

This month marks the twentieth anniversary of meeting my best friend, KD. I don’t recall the precise date of when we met, but I do easily recollect the exact circumstances regarding our initial introduction.

I was the new girl – I had moved to King of Prussia, Pennsylvania not a full year ago and due to circumstances I no longer remember, I was sent to kindergarten in another school district when my family and I first relocated. When it was time to enroll in first grade, my parents made sure I was at the correct school for our district, never mind the friends I had made in kindergarten, rules are rules. The only solace I had moving to the new school was that I was in the same classroom as a little girl I had met over the summer at day camp. For the first two weeks I stuck by her and slowly adapted to yet another big change.
Then, one morning my little friend did not show up at school. I was panic-stricken and haunted the classroom door during free play, convinced I could will her appearance. Suddenly, a light tap on my shoulder caught my attention and behind me stood a little girl with the longest, reddest hair I had ever seen. She held a game in her hand and shyly asked if I would like to play. I said sure and the rest is history.

Police Academy themed birthday party for KD, February 1990

For four years, KD and I were attached at the hip. We bonded over My Little Pony’s, Batman, Where’s Waldo, Dr. Quinn: Medicine Woman, The Renaissance Faire, The Simpsons and Muppets. KD gave me an appreciation for history, sarcasm and the B-52′s, and I in turn gave her a headache with endless hours of Willow, The Goonies and The Neverending Story.

I was mercilessly bullied in elementary school, not to mention quite ill with my congenital heart defect, going through not only two open-heart surgeries in the brief half-decade I lived there, but developing severe tachycardia as well. Through it all, KD was a constant figure, never once flinching or turning her back on me. My desire to be able to get up and play over at her house/at school/at my house always outweighed the pain and self-pity.

Her family quickly became a surrogate family for me, and to this day I refer to her parents as Mom and Dad. The happiest moments of my childhood revolve around spending time with KD and her family. We were both normally two children who played imaginary play by our lonesome, and our ability to interact with another or just enjoying the comfort of simply being with one another set us apart from our other friends. She played the part of doctors, healers, great thinkers, botanists, scientists, while I donned the role of princess, ditzy villain, jester, fairy, and vampire. We were both rock stars and pirates, though.

It was devastating for me to move back to California right before we were going to middle school, but we wrote, called and visited one another throughout junior and senior high school. College separated us by more than just distance, as each of us stayed in our resident states. Our goals were different, our hobbies and interests polar opposites of each other. Those four years were tough, and I worried greatly that KD would move on with her new, cooler friends and only think of me as a mere memory.
So much happened to us personally in those four years I found it challenging to find the two dorks who flew kites in Valley Forge Park and rode the fold-out chair bed down the staircase late at night during a sleepover.

I worried needlessly, as the summer of 2005 reinforced our friendship with a two week trip for me out to PA and a two month post-college chill out vacation in SoCal for KD. It was fabulous, and remains my favorite summer in adulthood yet.

Over time I realized we are the kind of friends who can go many months without speaking and pick up right where we left off, or easily find a new topic of interest to totally geek out about. We are permanent fixtures in each others lives, out of sight but not out of reach. KD has gone on to be an archaeologist, exactly what she set out to do since preschool, and remains to be a source for boasting on my part (“You know my best friend, KD – THE ARCHAEOLOGIST.”), based out of our nation’s capitol, no surprise from the biggest history nerd I’ve ever met. I remain to be flitting about as always, never quite settling on anything other than whatever I’ve got going on at the moment.
Through it all we still manage to connect – a Twitter reply here, a text message there – and it’s those brief moments in time that confirm the solidarity of a friendship twenty years and counting.

To: My bestest friend KD

Happy 20 years!

Your bestest friend for all time,
Rachael

Last night was the Los Angeles Twestival, an event for Twitter users (though non-Tweeps were more than welcome!) to get together and put the interwebs to good use by holding a charity fundraiser. The money from the ticket sales went to two charities, Chrysalis helping the economically disadvantaged and homeless find jobs and Los Angeles regional food bank. Continue reading

I needed to whip up some social networking/business cards for the Los Angeles Twestival this Sunday, only I knew I did not want to go with my standard printer type cards. I wanted to try something new; cards with bold designs that also incorporated the rule Reuse, Recycle, Reduce – so I decided to re-purpose some items around the house and use them to make fabulous, glamtastic networking cards for Glass of Win.com!

The first picture featured the materials I used:
1. Scissors
2. Adhesive (glue)
3. Colored pencils & one black pen (you can use markers too)
4. Random bits of decoration (flat-back plastic gems, confetti, etc)
5. Old magazines
6. Cardboard for base – boxes for cereal, tissue, and other items found around your home are best

I used a Trader Joe’s Steamer Clams box
Cut/unfold your box so that it is at its widest
Cut out the shapes from magazines that you want from the box. I cut out hearts, squares and rectangles.
Pick out the design/picture you want to use to cover the printed side of the cards.
Place the card-to-be over the design and cut around it.
Glue the magazine part on top of the shiny/printed side of your shape.

Fill out whatever information you want to share with people on the brown cardboard side using your colored pencils/pen (or whatever you want). I put down my website address, Twitter & Myspace and gave a little information about what to expect: “Blog & internet radio show.” Plus my name and tag line “geek girl extraordinaire”

Go nuts and make all kinds of cards! Just be sure to write your information down before you glue on any 3D gems/decoration!

I hope to see you at the Los Angeles Twestival, local readers!

What DIY project have you done lately, readers?

I was away from my home for five days, the same five days I am always gone every Labor Day weekend since 2004. During these five days I volunteer for a non-profit organization that benefits children. At this moment, I cannot go into details about it because I currently do not possess the permission to do so by said organization as it deals with minors and it’s all a very tender legal area. I’m sure you all understand.

The details do not matter at the moment, however, as that is not the precise point of this post. The point is that during these five days I am reminded why I am an important living creature on this planet, and why life is important. I don’t care what you believe in (or don’t believe in for that matter), I don’t care what cards you were dealt with in life, what path you had to walk down by force or choice, you matter. You are essential in this, the Grand Scheme of Things, and your voice counts for something. Now, what you decide to do with your voice (be it your actual chords, your writing, drawing, mathematical or scientific formulas) you can create a space for yourself to be heard and inspire others to take action and no only live their lives to the fullest, but to pass on the message and everything counts for something and everything is connected to everything.

I found it is a vital experience in the human life span to find time to be able to take a figurative step outside of myself and give unto others the best side of myself, the side that is open, warm, relaxed, receptive to all kinds of personalities, conditions and possible tribulations. Only then can I accept the differences in each other and come to terms with what I see as a weakness in myself, but can turn around and mold into a strength.
It is profoundly beneficial for each of us to realize we – as individuals – are not at the center of the universe, except for those which we create within the one we share with billions beyond billions of other life forms. You know what is at the center of this universe? Rocks and dust particles. Near as I can tell, anyway.

I would have never come to this realization had I not dove head first into volunteering for this non-profit organization. I would not have learned how to shun all inhibitions, leave my emotional baggage at the terminal so that I might have a clean, accepting shoulder for those who are in dire need of one.

You, too, can do this. You have the power to be someone for somebody. Not just anyone, I imagine. I’m not free from personality conflicts, as I gather many of you are not either. The trick is finding the kind of community you know you can get on well with (be it LBGQT, religion orientated, animals, ecological concerns, children, homeless, the medically ill, addicts, teenagers, handicapped adults, the mentally ill, elderly, political, etc) and you sign up to pitch in. Just do something; be that someone for someone, that living being trying to find solid ground as the Earth rotates just a wee off kilter for them.

We live in this wonderful age of accessibility. It’s time to turn away from the inanity of filler and fluff and look for something real, something that is going to reach out to others and connect us to one another and bring us together. I don’t want the human race to be the cause of this beautiful planet’s demise; I want us to win the war we rage with another. We can only do that if we extend our hand out, open our minds and hearts, and shut out our inhibitions.

QUESTION: are there any organizations you volunteer with, or causes you want to share?